In life, often we find that cards dealt to us can be a game changer...
During the course of my life, like many, I got so many mixed messages about what my life should be, and what direction I should go in. From my parents, and family, to friends and colleagues.
Realistically, much of the advice I was given was with the best of intentions, and much of it was given because the folks making the offer wanted me to have an optimal life. I really have appreciated it.
The only problem that I have had with it (you knew this was coming...), was that many of them didn't bother to say that I was worthy.
I've been heavy for most of my life, and I've struggled with trying to lose weight, and my Dad would tell me things like, "you don't want to be heavy when you die, you'll have to get a larger coffin." He really said that. In reality, I know that he was just trying to stem the tide of future difficulties with my health, and looking at my health standpoint today, he was as right as rain, but I wish that he would have told me, Charlie, I love you with all my heart, no matter what size you are, you are worthy to exist, and your life at any size matters.
My Mom, would do things like get on me about my weight on one hand, and feed me crap with the other. Such mixed messages. Don't get me wrong, Carmen and James (my parents...) were the most awesome, and loving people, but by the time of my birth, they were in the throes of marital problems, and in their insecurities they didn't have the tools necessary to nurture me in the way that would show me that I'm worthy.
Years later with my own children, I was an absentee Father. I'm in their life now thank goodness, but I have terrible struggles with guilt.
How on earth could they believe that they are worthy?
One of the beautiful things that I have learned about myself is that I really am an Ok guy, and that despite my occasional misgivings about lots of things, I deserve to be here.
I came to this realization one day when I sat in silence, and listened to my inner voice. That voice told me that I was created by Allah (God), and you know that He creates nothing that isn't perfect. What an absolute revelation that was for me, changed my entire perspective, and my trajectory.
Why YOU are worthy, is that the uniqueness that is you, came into this world to achieve whatever you desired. We cannot let the insecurities of others stem our tide. Yes, there does have to be balance, not everyone is destined for greatness, but they should still see their existence as valid.
So many folks need just a kind word to help them see that their life matters, and it's really kind of sad that we don't lift each other up more. We need to see that this planet and its inhabitants are necessary. Just as there different flavors of ice cream, we need to see that those myriads of flavors can be tasty and make us feel good inside.
I hope the day comes when every living thing realizes its potential, and sees its value. It's then and only then that we'll be able to turn the question of why you're worthy, into, why, you're worthy.
Remember, everyday in every way you are worthy..