Self discovery is something I feared for most of my life. Fear was not the word I used for it then, I knew it then as failure, self-loathing, worthlessness, and sin. On the outside I appeared another way, which was the intent, because I was too ashamed to let anyone know the truth. The truth at times was unbearable and when those thoughts would take over I felt such hopelessness and sadness.
I am not the same today as I look forward to truth and self discovery. My life is not based on fear any longer as I have discovered that I am worthy of love. I had to first forgive myself and to do that I had to understand that God had forgiven me. I was not taught the message of grace and I trembled with fear of what would lie before me on "judgment day". Well, my "judgment day" lasted for far too many years, I hated to look at myself in the mirror, I hated what I saw. No one could have judged me harsher than I did myself.
I wish I could have always seen what God sees... but I am thankful that I know that truth now... that I am a beloved child of God.
The self discovery is now a blessed revelation... I can not wait to see what God has in store for me next.
What we have once enjoyed deeply we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.
- Helen Keller